Having returned home this morning I found myself home alone, only a few things to do and otherwise a free Sunday afternoon. A rare treat for me.
So, surely with a free Sunday afternoon I would have been able to write something epic, awe inspiring and life changing; Sadly (probably) not, but I'll do my best with the time remaining.
I subscribe to lovefilm. If, like me, you suffer from a dwindling social life, sleeping trouble or periods of instant boredom, then you'll be on to a winner with this service. It's great and thoroughly recommend you trial it, even if you hate films (as you can also rent ps3 games, winner). Fast, easy to manage and you benefit from high turnover - unlike so many other things in life.
I found myself with 4 films to watch, all of which are fairly recent releases and to some degree had merited a place on my subscription lists, which I won't bore you with. I watched them in the order they arrived:
1. Red Riding Hood
2. Cowboys vs Aliens
3. Holy Rollers
4. Super 8
You'll note from the list seems random but I can (photographically) reassure you that this compilation is not the most odd thing I have received from lovefilm - as you'll denote from the attached picture (where someone has returned a copy of A Short Stay in Switzerland [a film about euthanasia] in a sleeve for a Jimmy Carr stand-up). Who would rent those 2 titles at the same time?!
Back to the matter in hand though. The beginning seems the best place to start...
Red Riding Hood: It's awful. Her dad is the werewolf. There, I've ruined it for you. The cast do their best to ruin it too, it just takes them 90 minutes to let you know that. It's hard to believe Gary Oldman can play characters which are so bad, when you see how fantastic he is in Tinker, Tailor, Soldier Spy! He's worse in this than he is in Bram Stoker's Dracula; yes, that bad. I re-watched the ending twice to make sure I didn't miss anything - turns out I didn't. Shame.
Now, to watch another film straight after that would surely seem to give the second film an unfair advantage. Ah, but the plot thickens...
Cowboys and Aliens: I was suspicious at the title's simplicity, surely there must be more to it than that?! I was looking for an action movie which would make me forget I had (in all seriousness) just watched a film with the girl from Mamma Mia in. But this has got Indiana Jones and James Bond in, it couldn't possibly make my day any worse could it?! But it did. It is rubbish, never have 2 genres clashed more horribly. Gold mining aliens?! I wanted Avatar-esque 'unobtainium' and a sense of ever evolving adventure not 'aliens are as greedy as we are, even in Westerns'. Instead of happily following what was ostensibly a 'bad guys do something good after being wronged' (vs. aliens) I just got bored, found the characters really dull and for the most part wanted the aliens to win so the film would end quicker.
I found myself asking "So why are they taking people?" - the aliens seemed happy enough to just smash people up into pieces one minute, but take hostages another. It's exactly what it says on the tin: cowboys (who make friends with indians, in the face of a common enemy - how touching) vs aliens (who have flying machines and massive guns, they could have killed the monster in Cloverfield, thats how kitted out they were). And it packs 0 punches, which given the cast is such a let down.
If you like westerns don't watch it. If you like sci-fi don't watch it. If you don't like either then this might just be the one for you.
2 bad films down. 2 films to go. 3rd times the charm and all that...
Holy Rollers: When you see the words "Based on true events" I'm thrown into the realms of suspicion. It's the basis for all exorcism films, makes you think it might happen. And that ties nicely into my review of this film: I would rather watch an exorcism film on repeat for the rest of my life than watch Holy Rollers again. I liked Jesse Eisenberg in Social Network, really rated him. Hence Holy Rollers made the cut.
The film is about drugs trafficking/dealing Jews. Yeah. It sounds like a comedy sketch, but it tries to expose a life lesson; be wary of how far you venture off the path, as you'll find it harder to know when or how to come back. I liked the portrayal of the relationship with his father, but beyond that it does not have much more to offer - unless you want an idiots guide of how not to be a Rabbi. It lacks the drugs glamour of films like Blow and as a result you aren't so easily pulled into the underworld - does Judaism have a hell equivalent?!
The trick to a good film is to keep you from thinking about the ending until the end of the film; this film fails to hide that. Too typical a story for effective adaptation - he cracks when things go wrong and it's obvious he's going to do that from the minute he gets exposed to trouble. Should have stuck to Rabbi training, would have made a better film.
So, one left. By this point I had expected Super 8 to complete the set - the four worst films in the world, ever. I didn't even know what a 'Super 8' was. For reference, Super 8mm film (or just Super 8) is a motion picture film format released by Eastman Kodak in 1965.
But, at last, this was the plot-twist in my day that my commitment to non-physical activity deserved!
Super 8: It's brilliant. A great Sunday film. A tale that starts with loss and enemies; a great young cast, all the trademark monster movie moments and it reminded me of the times when you and your friends used to be inseparable. It made me think of what weekends were supposed to be about!
I won't ruin this film by giving the plot away. I'll let you discover it for yourselves. Hey, you can trial lovefilm for free just make sure you rent the right films - that way your Sundays* can be Super (8) too.
*doesn't have to be Sundays.
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